A letter to a child whose parent has died

Dear Child 
​
You don’t know me but my name is Shaela. I am so sorry that your parent died. I have no words right now that can make you feel better but I am thinking of you. My Dad died when I was young like you, I was five.

You are probably feeling lots of things at the moment like shocked, scared, sad and angry. It's ok to feel shocked. It's okay to feel scared. It's okay to feel angry. It's okay to feel sad. You will probably feel these things for a while. Things you used to love doing might not make you feel as happy anymore. That’s okay too. Grief can make lots of things feel different. You might feel jealous and sad when other people talk about their parent. That’s okay and totally normal.

Just take one day at a time. Try to do things that you love and be with people you love. Things will never be the same again but over the next few days, months and years your heart will grow bigger. Your parent will always fill a piece of your heart and your heart will grow bigger around that so that you can find joy and happiness again.

Your parent will always be with you. Always. Watching over you and protecting you. Your parent loved you more than anything in this world and still does. They always will. Even though your parent is not here with you right now their love never dies.

Keep saying your parent's name. People may feel a little scared to talk about your parent that has died because they are scared they are going to make you feel sad. It’s okay to feel sad but never stop talking and writing about your parent and sharing all those amazing memories you have.

You will never stop thinking about your parent and some days might be really hard. You are a beautiful strong child and just like me, you will get through this.

I love reading a story to my daughters called the Golden Thread. Close your eyes and imagine a golden thread going from your heart right up into the sky and connecting to your parent's heart. Your parent is sending their love down to you and you are sending your love up to them.

Big love Shaela